The story about why a guy can never get a date

The story about why a guy can never get a date

Jeff walks into a bar and sees his friend Johnny slumped over the bar. He walks over and asks Johnny what’s wrong.

“Well,” replies Johnny, “you know that beautiful girl at work that I wanted to ask out, but I got an erection every time I saw her?”

“Yes,” replies Jeff with a laugh.

“Well,” says Johnny, straightening up, “I finally plucked up the courage to ask her out, and she agreed.”

“That’s great!” says Jeff, “When are you going out?”

“I went to meet her this evening,” continues Johnny, “but I was worried I’d get an erection again. So I got some duct tape and taped my p-nis to my leg, so if I did, it wouldn’t show.”

“Sensible” says Jeff.

“So I get to her door,” says Johnny, “and I rang her doorbell. She answered it in the sheerest, tiniest dress you ever saw.”

“And what happened then?”

(Johnny slumps back over the bar again.)

“I kicked her in the face.”

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